Want Ads (Glendaliz2010)

I read a book by Barbara DeAngelis Entitled “Are you the one for me” I love this book it's a very interesting read so if you haven't read it pick it up you will enjoy it. Anyway in this book I found some “Emotional want Ads” The first one is what most us want .
Wanted:
“Attractive, Sensitive, caring person for a permanent relationship.
Must be emotionally open, able to talk about feelings, unafraid of intimacy.
Successful but not a workaholic , with a great sense of humor.
Knows how to make me feel really loved and appreciated.
If you are healthy, honest, faithful and ready for
a commitment, I'm the one for you!”

That sounds great doesn't it. I want this person right NOW!
The books goes on to tell us how, many times we know what we want but instead of getting the things from the first “”Emotional Want Ad” we attract and end up with this :

Wanted:
“Self-absorbed, damaged loser who has lots of potential and is doing nothing with it.
Must be immature, irresponsible, and lazy. Low sex drive a bonus.
No skill, background or success required. If you're looking for someone to
make empty promises to and like to blame others for your
failures, call me now. Men with jobs need not apply”.

At first I thought this was hilarious, then I did the exercises in the book and realized that I was the poster child for attracting exactly what I did not want. Please pick up the book and read it. Like I said before it's very informative and insightful.
I'm an avid reader and I've come to realize that I am a work in progress, I am a never ending, always evolving spiritual being who's sole purpose in life is to manifest in this body my highest self. Basically to be the best person I can be one day at a time all the while learning about me and choosing to not make the same mistakes over and over BUT if and when I do make the same mistakes I FORGIVE myself.

“ To Find out what kind of person you've been seeking,
look at the kind of partners you've ended up with”
Barbara DeAngelis, Ph. D

I was attracting and still sometimes attract the kind of man that I'm suppose to stay away from.
They don't magically disappear, after all I am a very good looking single woman I'm not going to knock them for trying. The difference with me today is that I try very hard to listen to my innervoice, acknowledge those red flags and do what is in MY best interest. I do my very best to minimize the hurt for myself and a potential mate. I don't play around with anyone's emotions and I refuse to ALLOW anyone to play with mine lets not forget “Ghetto Girl” Still lives here.

With all the soul searching I've been doing and have done, I still found myself up at night thinking about my mate, the perfect man for me. On one of these nights I asked myself "Glendaliz what is it that you really want"? I thought about that for a little while and then I smiled because I realized that I didn't want perfection in a man , what I want, really want is to be able to perfectly see my imperfect man, to really see him and love him in all his imperfections that is what I most desire. I wrote the poem below on the night I realized what I needed. It was August, 2004

Imperfect man

The man for me I will find without being blind
I will take my time to find a friend
Someone in whom I can depend.
He will stimulate my mind and excite
My senses , without all the bullshit and drama
With all it’s consequences.
We will take the time to know one another
Without having to sex on each other.
He will be a gentleman in every way
And for this I will love him more
And more each day.
We will form a friendship based on trust
And build a foundation of love not lust.
In time in his eyes I will see
That he is in love with me.
We will be open with each other and
Share all our dreams
And one day I know happy I will be.
No longer am I looking for that perfect man
What I’m looking for is to see my
Imperfect man…..perfectly.

Written by Glendaliz Torres

ohhhhh You all thought I didn't have poetry skills? Yup I do , now you know something else about me. I told you there is a lot more to me, just pay attention.