What is a Strong Black Woman

What is a strong black woman?

every time I hear you say that it makes me cringe because it’s followed by all the reasons why you don’t need a man. Yet you do the singles things, try to get the hook up and you push up to men as if your life depends on it. Maybe your biological clock doesn’t realize that you got it going on. You shout to the world that it’s hard to find a good man but excuse me didn’t you say you didn’t need one?
You seek to impress with all your accomplishments and accolades as if those are the things that make you the woman , you don’t even see that the woman has disappeared. You have transformed yourself into a billboard of all you have done, yet you still seek that one.

What is a strong black woman?
Is it the fact that the world can’t see you cry yourself to sleep because no matter what you have bought you are still not happy? You say that your man NEEDS to have as much or more than what you have but you disrespect yourself all the time sleeping with the prestige and cash, but your still alone is that what makes you strong? Is a strong black woman that lost?

You can pay your own bills, buy your own home, drive your own car , pay for your own travel so why do you want a man, to carry your bags?
Your attitude of superiority makes the men you seek run. Yes they want a strong woman but they don’t want to compete for position with you. I’m not saying you should not be proud of what you have done I understand , you won. But how long will you continue proclaiming that you are a STRONG BLACK WOMAN! And crying yourself to sleep …alone?

What is a strong black woman? And why do you say men are intimidated by your success? Could they just have an aversion to the negative attitudes and behaviors you exude, who wants to date a woman that wants to rule? Oh yeah I forgot you’re a queen.
Has it ever occurred to you to look in the mirror and ask yourself “Who Am I” ?
Take away the job, the degree, the lipstick, the weave, the earrings, the expensive clothes what do you have , do you know , do you know?

What is a strong black woman ?
What makes you strong? Can you list the things that make you valuable? Without the material things you have acquired?
What is a strong black woman and why are they all alone? Can you find a happy medium so you can have a happy home?

Stop calling me bitching about how it’s so hard being an educated woman as if that’s what keep you from finding happiness. Stop telling yourself that you are some kind of commodity, wake up to reality. You strong black woman are the only one standing in the way of your happiness. Get over yourself. Go find that old lady down the street that raised 12 children, was married for 65 years , held it down when times got rough with no degree, no prestigious job, no designer clothes and sometimes not enough money to eat ask her to give you the meaning of a strong black woman and when she tells you ….be that.

Stop complaining that you can’t find a good man. Maybe you can’t find one because you need to find yourself first . What do you NEED, do you even know?
Stop believing that bullshit about the American Dream and start living by your own.
I think being a strong black woman means finding a balance in all you do but most of all finding that formula that works for you . And if you’re bitching and moaning about how hard it is to be a STRONG BLACK WOMAN then it’s not really working is it?
What is a strong black woman? Can someone please explain this to me?
I seek to be strong, I am an AFRO Latin woman, but what makes me a strong black woman? Do I even want to be what the world perceives that to be?

What is a STRONG BLACK WOMAN

Angry and Tired Woman

I am an Angry Tired woman……………..
I’m tired of this downward spiral called my life.
I’m angry that I continue to make excuses , fuss and fight and never look up to see that light.
It pains me to see that the dogs I speak of are my sons, that the hood rats I criticize are my daughters.
I’m tired of the shame I refuse to talk about, and the blame we sling at each other without taking accountability. Where in that is my responsibility ?
I’m tired of making the same mistakes over and over again because this is what I saw my mother do and now I repeat with my daughters. I’m angry that I can’t stop myself from being angry at my baby daddy’s when I know that my behavior teaches my children to be angry as well. I’m tired of blaming all men for the choices I have made , I was wrong I see that now but must you constantly use that against me? Must I use it against me?
I’m angry at my self for giving all of me away to men that never deserved me in the first place, I’m ashamed that I allowed this , I’m ashamed to realize that I didn’t know me enough to know I deserve better.
I’m angry that I didn’t take time to discover myself, and just accumulated pain after pain without self knowledge gained . I’m tired of this cycle of destruction of the soul, will I be fighting this plight til I’m old?
Believing that men are intimidated by me, falling into the trap of word fallacies?
I’m angry that I can’t find the balance in my life, who do I go to for this balance but into myself to find the sum total of who I am.
I’m tired of telling myself that there are no good men out there when I know this to be false when my actions of looking for one betray my thoughts.
I’m angry that I’ve allowed myself to call friends women that are just as bitter and destructive as I am, how am I to find the way if this is how I surround myself?
Why do I fear being submissive? If I have balance of mind & spirit why not follow a man of my choosing? .
I’m tired of bashing men, angry at myself for with every breath I use to condemn them I crucify myself.
I’m angry, down right angry that I don’t know what a true man is so I go by what I read in books or see on TV but in my heart I sense what a true man should be , can anyone point me to one ? I really would like to see….

I’m tired of measuring a man by what he drives, makes or has and then complaining that all he wanted was a piece of ass.
I want to be a wife and I’m tired of my friends telling me that my want is a fantasy , that my desire to have a healthy loving relationship is just a dream, but if I look inside will I not find that wife?
I’m angry that I don’t know how to connect with positive females that will not try to make me live my life in fear by telling me I will burn in hell for my mistakes , offering no real solution only absolution that still
leaves me powerless.
I’m tired, sick and tired of complaining about my baby daddy’s as a means to take away the responsibility of looking at what I have done to my life. I’m tired of the drama, tired of the pain, angry at the accusation , disgusted with myself.
I’m tired of having a mirror held up to my face , I hate what I have done to me, but can’t find any other way to be.
I’m sad, tired, angry and I’m sick and tired of being sad tired and angry.
I need you all to just let me be, give me space to look at this face.
I’m taking the time to go inside and find that which I’ve tried to hide.
That I want better , that I am better, that I have everything to offer, that I am that which gives life, and I WANT TO CHANGE.
I’m a tired angry woman looking desperately for solutions but because you are angry at me you can not see the pain in my actions so you condemn me to a life of negativity…I am better than that!
I am tired of being an angry tired woman I want to be free of these shackles I’ve found the solution , and that solution is in ME.

I am to LOVE

I am to love….

I am to love myself that is the beginning of everything. My therapist says this, the books I read say so.
Loving me means being kind to myself, loving, honest and nurturing with myself. Embracing every part of me. Yet when I embrace myself I feel so unpretty , so unloving , who will love me when I can’t love myself. I tell myself that I do love me, but do I really?
Was I loving myself when I went from one relationship to the next , allowing myself to be abused and disrespected. Or when I allowed other to tell me who I am, and make me what they thought I should be?

Was I loving myself when I convinced myself that sex was the expression of love, how can my love be between my legs? When I am alone with my thought and I hear you’re stupid ,fat, poor, short, useless, a failure is that my truth? Am I being measured by the expectation of you? Or am I allowed to be me?

Loving myself is the beginning of everything. Why does everything seems so perfect except for me? Is my imperfection lovable? Why does everyone hold a mirror to me and tell me “this is your truth” how can they posses a mirror of my truth when I sit here so confused. Is my worth found in the pages of a magazine? Looking fly, smelling like dollars? How do I love this me when the world tells me I am all wrong?

I’m not tall enough, my shape is wrong, my accent is strong, you’re too loud, too outspoken, you don’t know you place you don’t have the right face. This is the world in which I live, at time this is the world that gave birth to me and watched me grow.
This is where I learn to love others, to be nice to them or they will not like you, be polite or they won’t befriend you. Sacrifice, sacrifice sacrifice. Is this to be my life?

I am to love myself, that is the beginning of everything, but how do I find me in the mist of confusion, out dated beliefs and judgment within? How can I know truth when I am told that God loves me yet he created a place called hell to send me to when I am not perfect, yet no one is perfect.

How can I appreciate my mind when I’m told that these questions are wrong, therefore I AM wrong.
How can I know love when I am raised to believe that others have the keys to that love.
How will I find acceptance when I am told I have to make a good first impression, am I not a good enough impression the second or third time? How can i be truth if the first impression is a lie?

I am to love myself, that is the beginning of everything, everything, everything ….
My beginning to everything was to let go of all things, all your judgments, all the ideas that I’m wrong, all the illusions of being right , the deceptions handed down to me, the expectations of what becomes of me, the idea that I’m done, false beliefs that lead me further away from my Self with each passing day. The belief that I NEED YOU TO LOVE ME.

I am becoming and like a phoenix I rise ,to love myself inspite of this world. yes loving myself is the beginning of every thing , every single part of me even when I’m tempted to judge myself I have learn to forgive myself. I embrace, love and honor me even in the mist of YOUR lies called my truth.

I embrace my fat thighs, my small breast, my plump face, even that section of my belly that use to be flat, my quick temper, my accent, my not knowing, my emotions, my past , my compassion, MY values, the victories that no one else can see, I’m embracing all of me because I and only I have possession of My mirror and it tells me that I am perfect just the way I am ….I am to love myself, that is the beginning of My everything

WEAK

“Sometimes I'm afraid to be weak because I fear I will be judged, then I realize that the judgment comes from me because I have never allowed myself to embrace my weakness“.
I posted that on my Face Book page. When I read it back to myself it just didn’t sit right with me I wasn’t sure if I was correctly articulating what and how I was feeling.
So I looked up the word WEAK . When I looked it up it did not describe what I was feeling at all. That made me wonder, why didn’t I ever look it up before?
I took it for granted that for years we have been throwing that word around like rice at a wedding and using it wrong.

I’ve always considered myself strong to the world , yet having personal moments of weakness. Moments when I felt defeated, helpless and emotional spent, moment when I would cry because I felt so overwhelmed with problems I myself created. I can honestly say I HATED being thought of as weak. Because I am not.

When I wrote the statement on face book I started to think about my weaknesses and I realize that what I was calling weakness was not weakness at all.
I’ve gone through things, endured pain, and made mistakes just like anyone else and maybe a little more than others. I hated the thought that others might think I was weak , if I cried, was too emotional, expressed my anger, or complained about an injustice. I kept my feelings very well tucked in or so I thought. I tried to be positive and upbeat but there were things happening in my life that would bring a grown man to his knees. I’m not WEAK. ! I would say this to myself as if to tell the world but the one that needed to believe it was me. I have made many strides in this journey called my life. Lost a few friends, family bonds that I thought were strong sort of dissolved but I was and I am willing to do this work of finding myself.

Which means really defining who I am on my terms and WEAK I am not. I am an emotional woman , full of compassion and grace and if that makes me weak I will be that because it’s who I am.
But if you look up the word Weak in the dictionary you will not find me there.
Now Vulnerable yes that I am !! Because I have chosen to open my heart to all there is to being me, so that I can reconnect with my soul. It’s actually my SOUL PURPOSE.
In being Vulnerable I open myself to all possibilities including the possibility to be hurt, taken advantage of and being harmed. Knowing theses things I still seek to take this journey and everyday I’m learning new things about myself, new feelings to explore and old ways that were not working for me find themselves discarded. It’s not easy walking to the beat of my own drum, making up the rules as I go along.

Yes I’m scared but I am by no means WEAK. I am vulnerable to being hurt, harmed, taken advantage of and all those thing we women seem to think make us WEAK , but when I open myself to those things I also open myself to be loved, trusted, comforted , cared for and most of all I open my mind to find the strength I need to be good to myself even when all else seems to be against me. I open myself to find that love within and it’s the most beautiful feeling in the world. No I am NOT a weak woman. I am a divine spiritual soul on a journey to reconnect and remember my true nature…LOVE



Sometimes I'm afraid to be weak because I fear I will be judged, then I realize that the judgment comes from me but I’m strong enough to understand that weakness is not of me. I don’t have to embrace my weakness because they never were. I choose not to judge myself, instead I can experience myself. And you know what it’s okay to be afraid, when I’m afraid it’s because I don’t know and when I don’t have any preconceived ideas of how things should be I’m open to the greatest possibilities of how things are. By allowing myself to let go of my idea or how it’s always been my soul speaks to me.

Tonight I allowed myself to be still so that I could understand what it was that I was feeling and this that I write was my answer. It’s not simple, maybe even complicated but when you really think about it, it’s my spirit teaching me that I’m important and the things that I think are true are false if they do not come from LOVE.
There is no real weakness, there is only acceptance of all that I am, and I am Everything !

A Conversation with You

August 19, 2008

There are so many things that I need to tell you, but I’m not sure you will understand.
You see I’m hoping that you’re one of these new kinds of bruthas that are bringing back the real meaning of man.

There are things to be said, conversation to be had and thoughts to be provoked when two people are trying to get to know one another.
There are thing about me that you should know so that there are no misunderstanding, no lack of comprehension, no falsehood, or misguiding.

I need you to know that I’m not looking for a lover, a lil friend, or a “in case of sexual emergency call”……I need a man that will stick with me for the long haul.
To build a relationship, not just have relations with.

I’m saying these things to you because I know that the old belief that “if you love me you would know” doesn’t work, that is unless you are psychic.
I understand that I have to express to you what I need from you so that we can come to an understanding before moving on to another phase of this relationship. They say a closed mouth doesn’t get fed, so I feel obligated to feed you who I am so that you can marinate in the thought of me, and figure out if this is a meal you wish to consume.

At this stage in my life I’m very knowledgeable in who I am, what I need and Want from a man and I also understand that these needs can and will change, but some needs I know will stay the same.
I need romance in my life and only you can provide this so I need you to be romantic, lets have a picnic, or walk in the rain (don’t worry baby I can get my hair wet). Call me and tell me that you were thinking of me. Don’t be afraid to show me your vulnerability, because I am your tranquility and I will care for those feelings you share. When I say that I want a man to be sensitive to my needs, I understand fully that you will also be sensitive to yours and I will not criticize this …it’s what I need.

I understand and know that you cannot be my all, my everything , I should not rely on you for my happiness because my happiness is my responsibility.
My intention is to be happy with you. I come to you as a whole person not half of one expecting you to complete me. You carry enough responsibility. let do this together and truly create a partnership with two people becoming one, making two. Not two halves making a whole, for some reason that has proven not to work.

Allow me to take care of you I know it’s hard sometimes to accept this as real, but I have no other motive than expressing how I feel. Allow me to be the true essence of woman.
All that you give will be returned 100 times over. I am a woman that fully understands her role in a man’s life. I will uplift, support and inspire you to be the man god has meant for you to be. I have a natural need to show and express my love, I need you to inspire me, motivate me, and encourage me to give this love to you. Don’t just assume that you got me and that’s all there is to do?

Let’s cuddle together and watch a favorite movie, or sit on the porch and read poetry to each other with the rain making gentle music in the background. Let‘s talk about those past experiences that have made you the man you are today with no judgment or interrogations about your past love frustrations. After all we all have past lessons that created who we are today and getting to know those things about each other will be worth what we have to say.
Let’s dance to our favorite slow jams. Talk about growing up, favorite food, who we wish to be, what we want to do, just sharing in each others lives sounds nice.

I need you to understand my dreams and aspirations, and if our energy is on the same journey stand with me in this book called my life and even write a chapter or two then we can start the book on our life.
Let’s have long conversations so that we can get to know each other even before we are….. in each other.
Isn’t that what we complain about “had I just taken the time to get to know him/her” isn’t time what it’s about?
Let’s do this for each other take the time and leave no doubt. Ask me for the things you need instead of assuming, because only when you tell me can you be sure that I know. Let’s communicate and make a decision never to stop.

I want to be your cheerleader, not the one out in front grabbing the spotlight waving pom poms and saying to the world “look who he is because of me”!!! I want to be the one you turn to, the one that needs no spot light in your journey because when you shine your light also shines on me, but I do need you to include me in your journey if this is were you need me to be, because this allows us to make memories. At some point if we are the right ones for each other our journeys will have the same outcome so we must be able to express our dreams and goals and together if it’s god’s will…...make it happen.

You must be thinking that I’m hiding something because finances have yet to be mentioned.
Why is it that we are so scared of this topic, can you and I speak on this and answer these questions to each other. Do you really believe a woman is only after what a man can give her financially? Do I really believe that all a man will do is lay up in my home make no contribution, get a piece of my love and then bounce? Let’s talk and see what we think.

But let me say this and maybe you will feel more at ease. I believe a man should be able to provide not only financially, but emotionally, sexually, and physically.
For a very long time I’ve provided those things for myself.
I took care of my emotional need because that it what I must do. I have yet to find a man that I can be emotionally liberated with and not be told I’m weak or too emotional. I’ve had to provide and prepare for my own financial needs and I do a great job of it, but I still need you.
I’ve raised 3 children on my own and have done a very good job so I had to get my hustle on, but I still love you.

I can repair my own garbage disposal, take out the trash, and fix my breaks…. I’ve had to, but I still need and want you.
When my body aches to release sexual tension I can pleasure myself for hours, but it’s not you …I still desire you.
Plain and simple, no matter how I’ve had to step it up in my life because of the choices I’ve made you have always been someone I want and need by my side….my man

I will love you when you’re making the dollars, and I will love and support you more when times get hard and you’re pounding the pavement trying to get back on top.


Know this: when and if those times show up you can rest assure that I will hold it down until our time comes back around.
I don’t need you to fill all my needs, that is the reason why we have so many different relationships in our lifetime, we have friends, sisters, brothers, children, Pastor, parents and so many more and there is always someone that can fill a certain need, but as my man, and future husband there are some needs that only you can and should fill as there are some needs that for you only I can and should fill.

With you I want to do things right. I want to have a healthy relationship. I want us to discuss all those things we neglected to discuss in our past relationships. Like what do you consider cheating and will my feelings on that have an effect on your perspective?
What is spending time together? Is it riding home in the same car, bathing together? Although that last one is very nice….lol but what does spending time mean to you? What are the agreement about finances?
Do we know when it’s okay to give each other advice? Do we always need to give it? Or just stop to listen.
These are things we should talk about. Do you need me to watch the game with you? Can I just make all the snacks and leave you and the boys to yourselves? Can I discuss a problem with you without you feeling that I want you to solve it for me? Can we try to be the best we can in each other?
Some of these things although they may seem petty are things that if important enough can ruin a relationship if they were not respected ……so let’s talk about them.

Let’s LISTEN to each other.

I want to be ONE of the most important people in your life, not a second thought. I want to be the first person you say good morning to and I want you to know that because you are in my life every morning is good. I want be the last person you say goodnight to and have visions of me while you sleep …is that scary? I want you to know that I see you even when the things I see in you have yet to manifest. I want to see myself in your eyes, and always be able to make you smile. We can have this and more baby.
We we just have to be committed to take it there…can you make that commitment?
I need you to woo me, win me over, sweep me off my feet because I will do everything in my power to get into your heart, knock you off your feet and convince you that I’m the real deal. Can you see yourself building a life with me? Leaving a legacy of love, friendship and commitment for others to follow, for our children to be proud of?

I’m stepping up! I’m stepping to you; I’m coming to you with something real I don’t have much right now just the way I feel.
Can I offer you the promise of nothing but the best to come?. I’m putting myself out there because I’m feeling you, I’m not afraid of rejection what do I have to lose? I’m not afraid to let you know what I need and expect from you, I’m not afraid to allow you to love me, I’m not afraid to trust because not trusting you means I don’t trust myself , I’m not afraid to make a mistake because that is how I grow.
I’m not afraid to start a life with you although I don’t know you…..YET.

He Inspires Me

He inspires me to be me.
In all my raw nudity he finds my beauty.
In the nakedness of me he finds comfort.
Never have I been so aroused by the simple, yet natural feeling of acceptance.
In his eyes I can see myself as only he can see me, and with every moment we share he
Brings out all that is me.
He inspires me without saying a word, to discover what had laid uncovered the essence of my womanhood which only seeks to be understood
Without touching he brings me to my natural state of being …one with me.
Understanding that as I unfold into myself I am opening to the world all of my goodness which can leave him breathless, and eagerly anticipating the joining of our souls
He inspires me to sing the songs of my tears. with every drop leaving behind my insecurities, mistakes and fears.

He inspires me, he inspires me , he…inspires me
Through the distance he encourages me to flow into feelings I have yet to experience , taste joy I only dreamed of , and embrace the sadness that engulfs my love.
Releasing me to drink of life, without judgment, constrictions or expectations.
He inspires me to be all woman. Excepting the masculine and feminine of me , challenging me to go deeper by accepting my journey, and understanding that at times I have to walk alone, yet I can always feels him as he walks his path to a destiny unknown.

He inspires me to be what I say and say what I am to be , such is he and he is what he is.
As turbulent as the pull of the moon, as gentle as a summers breeze, as comforting as a mothers embrace as passionate as two lovers finding themselves at a lose for words , where only the essence of their love can speak ….he is what inspires me.
To stay strong and be weak, to continue the path that I seek. To be demure and submissive, to be the voice that give us…breath.
To rise in all my glory , to inspire others with my story. To be the power of my truth of old, that holds the keys to the mysteries yet to unfold.

He inspired my mind to feel this rhyme, understanding that I am just and evolution in time, of what he is, what he brings, what he sees, what he feels , all that he is lives in me not just in his seed but in what he deems he is. The very basic of my needs, the aspiration of dreams …..he IN-SPIRES ME,
to be the love I seek, the truth I am, and the honesty to be had. He inspires me to listen and learn the very basics of speaking not to be heard but to hear every word that I say , through me he speaks.
He inspires me to constantly challenge myself to be the woman I wish to offer the world not for him but for me.
He inspires me.

my thoughts

Today I was in a little funk. It was a day of things not going my way, pressure mounting for me to come through as a mom, financial issues, school issues, deadlines etc. you name it, thing were just coming up. I was feeling very overwhelmed and anxious. On top of all this I was experiencing a case of the loneliness.
I had been fighting it off it seem from the time I awoke. With the loneliness comes the realization that it’s just me. I’m it. I begun to feel sorry for myself. Trust me I know when it’s happening I’ve done it enough to see it coming. But you see this is not a place I wish to visit I decided 5 years ago that I would make my life different by changing my behaviors, thoughts and beliefs and I’m doing pretty good. I’m proud of what I have accomplished. It may not be much to most but I am a new me and no one can begin to understand what I’ve struggled with unless they have been where I’ve been.

I remember thinking when I first set out on this journey that I would just learn new behaviors and thoughts and retrain my consciousness and I would be done. That is such an adorable thought, but it’s not reality.
I still have funky days, they will happen. They happen to us all. I still fight with old thoughts that creep up and tell me that I’m not good enough. That my life is a mess and it will always be. Or that I can’t get things right.

I still have these thoughts they don’t magically disappear just because I now fill my home with positive affirmations, or because I’ve read 75 self-help books or gone to 12 make your life better works shops. They are there just waiting for a little break in my resolve, a little window of fear and opportunity to bring me back to the belief that I am helpless. I believe that because I have made a decision to not go back to the woman I use to be I can clearly see when things are happening in my life that would or do have the potential to get me down. I ask myself questions about how I’m feeling and why? Most of the time my own mind lies to me , my ego takes over and I function through what I call ego living, not a good place to be because you are always checking for what others have that you don’t or what others do that you can’t. trust me that kind of living is not very good for anyone it defeats the purpose of living because you are always looking for something that you assume you lack.

But anyway I digress I was talking about my funky disposition yesterday. I was really feeling tired, and I just wanted to just give all my problems to anyone but me , this is the point where I start to think that being a 60’s woman would be great. If all I had to do was look beautiful and only think of what I was going to cook for dinner that would be heaven. Then I started to yearn for all the things I don’t have, especially not having a partner, a man, a husband , a companion. Not having that person that I could talk to and would support me and love me . That person I can lean on and feel protected by, because although I am doing the dayum thing by myself , I’m not doing it because I want to I’m doing it because I had to.
This is a hard journey , the journey of getting to know yourself and it can be very lonely , but I realize that it’s never as bad as my mind wants me to believe . I do have someone that I can talk to, someone that makes me feel safe, secure , supported and yes loved and appreciated. Sometimes we can get so overwhelmed with life that we forget what we do have. So my relationship is a little different than a traditional relationship, I get what I need from it. It would be very easy for me to talk myself out of being in a great relationship because it’s not what most would call normal. I could talk myself into a funk because my day is not going as planned , or what I expected it to be.
The conversations I have with myself are what gets me through these times. I understand how my mind use to function and these thoughts do not go away. It’s a constant struggle because they come up at the most inconvenient time.
There are days when I feel invincible and powerful and that little voice will come in disguised as fear and try to convince me that I can’t do something . It’s important for me to push past these thought because through the fear , on the other side is who I am. Just waiting for me to succeed.
I guess what I’m trying to say is that we have to stop getting in the way of our own happiness. Think outside the box when it comes to making yourself happy. Sometimes it may not look like you thought it would but you have to ask yourself the questions that will allow you to dig deep and find what really makes YOU happy. Embrace the challenges even when you feel that you are not up to it, even when embracing it means questioning why you are feeling funky and being okay with the answer. I’ve learned to forgive myself for being human. I’m not suppose to be perfect nor are my feelings.

I’m very lucky to have someone that I can share my days with, my thoughts, my fears and my struggles, when it gets lonely he is always there I’m grateful for that. When I’m feeling funky or having a challenging day I check my thoughts. It’s not a magic formula I just ask myself if what I’m feeling is real or is this something I’m making up. You know what my life is what it is. Is it worse than others yes, is it better than others yes but the important thing is that it’s MY life, good or bad I love it! So I had a funky day , hmmm how can i make it better tomorrow?

I can make it better by really seeing things for what they are not what my ego says they should be .